it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
I am available for nakedness
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
Randomize
