you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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