I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
He gave me a brownie at the beginning of class and now I can't feel my face.
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