I think i sorta joined a cult last night
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize