After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
