The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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