He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I think you would be disgusted with me if you knew how many times I had imaginary sex with you today
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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