Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
So I'm dropping a fat deuce at work, and the lock on the stall door slips and the door slides open, when suddenly someone comes in. Now I have two options, I can either get up quickly and try to shut the door quickly (not easy to do with one hand) or I can just sit there and play it off like it's no big deal and I always dump at work with the door open. I chose option two, and it was as awkward as it sounds.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I think it’s appropriate to celebrate the start of mother’s day at the bar with the men that almost made me a mother
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
