My 12 y/o god son's bandmate just asked me to their school dance. Still he's a better catch than the last one...
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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