I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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