we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
Randomize
