Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(415): View more from California

Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?

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(608): View more from Wisconsin

The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.

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(404): View more from Georgia

All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.

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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.

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(862): View more from New Jersey

I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.

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(828): View more from North Carolina

Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.

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(740): View more from Ohio

Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.

(1-740): View more from Ohio

Why haven't you proposed already?

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(503): View more from Oregon

You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you

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