Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
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