Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
