I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
Randomize
