So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
what is it with giant penises always finding me
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
Randomize