I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
