Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
