I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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