Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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