well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
Randomize
