what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
