I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
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