yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
