she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
So that advice that humming stops you from puking? Yeah no, just puked through my nose.
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Randomize
