My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
Randomize
