I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
We are two peas in an std pod
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Sorry that I got drunk and refused to let you buy me pizza. I'm a monster and I understand if you hate me forever
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
