I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
He left his cock-ring in my truck.
Consider it a gay sex souvenir.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Randomize
