Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
