You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
