Remember that time i walked in on your friend taking a huge shit?
Remember that time you hooked up with him?
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
