and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
Randomize
