whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
This isnt meant to be as creepy as it sounds, but do you seriously want a lock of the hair I cut off?
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
Randomize
