I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
I seem to have forgotten that I am wearing a one piece bathing suit under my clothes
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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