Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I party with great urgency now.
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