her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
Randomize
