her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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