If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
they're doing drop shots of Jager into red wine. i don't want to be on that level
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
