You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
Last night I flashed a car full of people my tits for a bag of pretzels so yeah I'd say I was at least tipsy.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
