She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Yup on the verge of buzzed and drunk. I managed to make my way into my cat's box house to fall asleep. I'm comfortable
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
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