hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
My cousin was arrested on a class b felony for selling meth out of the back door of McDonald's where he worked. Apparently it was the extra special sauce.
It was a career choice to be sure... Mistakes were made.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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