Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
Randomize
