Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
It's okay, I found my phone in the toaster oven. Logical explanation: 5 martinis
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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