so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I think I'm the only sober person in the whole bar. If you count drinking less than 10 tequilas sober.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
You were trust falling into bushes
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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