Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Randomize