walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize
