i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Best and worst whiskey dick ever. I am hungover and can't move from the hours of sex, he on the other hand has a raw bruised dick. I win.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize