I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
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