so let's talk penis.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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