Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
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