I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
It's 1:37. You have 23 minutes to get your dick to the bar before I go home with the bartender... tick... tick...
Randomize